| Answer
from Jesus:
I have already commented
on this issue in the answer to several other questions in this section,
and my comments are relevant to this answer. I also recommend that you
consider my answer to a question about how to combat a lifelong
addiction. However, I would like to take this opportunity to give
a deeper teaching on the issue of sex. I realize that this issue has
been a problem for many truly spiritual people, so let me give you some
teachings that might help people get a deeper understanding.
As I explained elsewhere,
your lifestream was first created by your spiritual parents. You were
crated as an individualization of God, and your unique individuality
is expressed and anchored in your spiritual self, or I AM Presence.
At some point your lifestream decided that it wanted to experience the
material universe from the inside and it wanted to help co-create this
aspect of God's creation. Your lifestream then created an extension
of itself, which is your soul.
The important point to understand in this context is that the soul was
never created to be alone. It was created as an extension of your spiritual
self, and it was literally meant to be at planet orbiting the sun of
your spiritual self. However, your soul is endowed with a sense of individuality
and a sense of existence, and your soul has free will. Therefore, it
is possible that your soul can change its sense of identity so that
it no longer sees itself as an extension of the I AM Presence. This
is indeed what happened in the process that the Bible describes as the
Fall of Man and which, as I explain throughout this website, was a fall
into a lower state of consciousness.
To use the planetary metaphor, one might say that the planet of your
soul stopped spinning on its axis. You know that if the Earth stopped
spinning, one side of the planet would be in constant darkness. If you
were living on that side of the planet, you might have no idea that
there was a sun shining on the other side. This then is literally what
has happened to most souls on Earth. They have forgotten the sun of
the spiritual self.
However, this forgetfulness only exists at the surface level of consciousness.
The soul can never fully forget that it was created as an extension
of the I AM Presence. Even though the soul can build a separate sense
of identity, it can never feel complete and whole in that sense of identity.
The soul can feel whole only when it is consciously connected to the
I AM Presence. Therefore, even though a soul has fallen into a lower
state of consciousness, it still has a deep inner longing for wholeness,
a deep inner sense that something is missing from it's life.
When you understand this, you realize that the majority of the thoughts,
feelings and actions in which people engage relate to the deep inner
sense of aloneness or lack of wholeness that souls feel. If you look
at my discourse on the different levels of spiritual
development, you might say that the further people descend into
the lower state of consciousness, the more lonely they feel. Yet because
they cannot or will not recognize the spiritual side of life, they have
no way to resolve this sense of aloneness. Instead, the only option
is to cover over the sense of being alone and unwhole.
This then leads to all kinds of beliefs and behaviors that are directed
at diverting their attention from the deep inner sense of emptiness.
It also leads to a number of beliefs that are designed to make people
feel that they don't need to change their lives, that they are okay
as they are or that there is no way out of the sense of emptiness. Such
beliefs and behaviors can very quickly lead to various types of addictions
to the things of this world, meaning everything from chemical substances
to possessions, power and sex.
Incidentally, many of these addictions are encouraged by or even created
by certain orthodox or fundamentalist beliefs. Such closed belief systems
are designed to prevent people from recognizing and doing something
about their inner sense of emptiness. They are designed to keep them
trapped in the material world instead of transcending this world by
reuniting with their spiritual selves.
Any type of belief system or behavior that leads people into an emotional
or physical addiction is always supported and reinforced by the dark
forces who seek to control people. That is why breaking an addiction
is literally a battle for the survival, the spiritual survival, of your
soul. What I am trying to explain here is that for people who have descended
far into the carnal state of mind, such addictions are primarily the
result of an unwillingness to face the need to reconnect the soul to
the I AM Presence. It is an attempt to push aside the need for true
personal change and spiritual transformation.
As people rise to higher levels of awareness, they begin to recognize
the spiritual side of life. They become more consciously aware of the
fact that their souls are not whole and that they need to become whole.
As a result, they begin to realize that the things of this world will
not make them feel whole. This will gradually help them overcome addictions
to outer things, and they begin to focus most of their attention on
the spiritual needs of the soul. They no longer feel a need to cover
their sense of aloneness; they feel a need to truly resolve it. Yet
at the beginning stages of this growth process, it is almost inevitable
that the soul will reason that, because it feels unwhole, it must need
something from outside itself in order to become whole. Therefore, the
soul will throw itself into a search for that magical something that
can make it feel whole.
One aspect of this search is the search for the perfect partner, including
the perfect sexual partner. Many people experience brief glimpses of
inner wholeness as a result of sexual union. This is a natural process,
which if used correctly can actually serve to heal the soul of its sense
of separation. Unfortunately, as I explain in another
discourse, everything in this world is a two-edged sword. Therefore,
what can serve as a tool for the soul’s liberation can also become
a trap for the soul, and this is especially true of sex.
The problem occurs when spiritual seekers begin to believe that sexual
union is necessary to experience wholeness. This can lead to an emotional
attachment to sex, which can become a spiritual addiction. I realize
this is a subtle distinction, but what I call an outer addiction is
an activity that is designed to cover the souls sense of not being whole.
In other words, it numbs the soul. A spiritual addiction is something
that makes the soul feel that its wholeness is dependent upon engaging
in a certain activity. Incidentally, religious activities can become
such a spiritual addiction, but since the topic is sex, I will not go
into that here.
My point is that for many truly spiritual people, sex becomes a spiritual
addiction. They literally begin to believe that the key to their inner
wholeness is to find the perfect partner, and this leads many people
into a lifelong search for the perfect spouse and the perfect sex. Most
of these people are not addicted to sex as a physical addiction. They
are not really addicted to sex in the traditional sense. However, they
have a deep desire to feel whole and connected and they believe sex
is the way – perhaps the only way – to fulfill this desire.
This is a subtle point that might require some contemplation. As a soul
grows in spiritual awareness, it will become more aware that it is unwhole,
and it will develop a stronger desire to overcome the sense of not being
whole. If the soul does not fully understand that ultimate wholeness
can be experienced only through union with the I AM Presence, then the
soul might believe that the key to wholeness is to experience union
with another part of life, meaning another person.
Obviously, sexual union is a powerful way to experience oneness with
another person. Because the soul has such a strong desire for wholeness,
the soul can develop a very strong desire for sexual union. Such people
want to have as much sex as possible, often with more than one partner.
Some people have such a strong desire for union with life that they
want this union with any person who seems attractive to them. They believe
that sex will bring them closer to wholeness. In other words, sex is
not used to cover over the desire for wholeness or to divert the attention
from this desire. Sex is now used as a tool for creating a sense of
wholeness.
Now comes the real subtle point. At certain stages of the spiritual
path, this can actually have a beneficial effect. If a soul engages
in sex out of a true desire to attain a state of wholeness, sex can
actually help the soul achieve healing. By engaging in sexual union,
especially if it is done with true love and care for a partner, the
soul can heal and overcome its sense of aloneness. It can also become
far less centered in the carnal state of identity that developed after
the fall. This is the true potential of a successful
marriage in which husband and wife attain the highest spiritual
union.
However, as the soul rises on the spiritual path, there will come a
point where it needs to transcend its use of and understanding of sex
as a tool for union. As I said earlier, at the beginning stages of the
spiritual path it is almost inevitable that the soul believes that in
order to become whole, it needs something from outside itself. This
is true in the sense that the soul can attain wholeness only through
union with the I AM Presence. The subtle illusion that traps many truly
spiritual people is that they believe that God or the spiritual self
is somehow, somewhere outside of themselves. This one illusion is the
most difficult illusion to overcome for any spiritual seeker.
Many souls have made great progress on the spiritual path. Unfortunately,
many of them reach a threshold from which it is extremely difficult
to proceed. The only way to get beyond this threshold is to stop looking
for something outside of yourself. You need to overcome any attachment
to, any co-dependence upon, anything that you perceive as being outside
of yourself. You need to realize that the only key to wholeness is found
inside yourself.
As I said earlier, the soul is created as an extension of the spiritual
self. An extension of the spiritual self is not apart from, it is not
separate from, the spiritual self. This is the problem that occurs in
the world of form, because in this world you see different forms as
being separate. Even the model I just gave you of the soul being like
a planet orbiting the sun promotes this sense of separation. One might
therefore contemplate a different model, where the soul is seen as a
wave on the ocean of the spiritual self. In other words, the soul is
no more separated from the spiritual self than a wave is separated from
the ocean.
The essential point here is that you cannot attain ultimate wholeness
as long as you think that wholeness depends on anything outside of yourself.
The key to wholeness is to stop seeing yourself as being separated from
your source, meaning both your spiritual self and God. The sense of
separation exists only in your mind, and therefore the only place to
overcome that sense of separation is in your mind. You must overcome
the illusion that you were ever separated from your spiritual self.
You must come to realize that the key to making contact with your spiritual
self, the key to attaining union with that spiritual self, is to direct
your attention inside of yourself and to stop directing it outside yourself.
You must stop looking for the philosopher’s stone, the magical
wand that will suddenly make you feel one with God. The philosopher's
stone is not outside yourself; it is inside yourself—it is your
Christ self.
So my point here is that for many truly spiritual people sexual union
can eventually become a trap that prevents them from looking inside
themselves because their attention is always directed towards a partner.
Many spiritual people intuitively feel that there is a legitimate goal
behind their desire for sexual union, and this makes it very difficult
for them to overcome the desire for sex. They feel that they would lose
something important by giving it up. This sets up an inner conflict
that will make it virtually impossible to overcome any desire for sex.
Take note of an essential point. As long as you have an inner conflict
about any aspect of the spiritual path, you cannot take the next step
on the path. You will be stuck at that step until you resolve the conflict
and achieve inner clarity and oneness of purpose. This can be achieved
only by reaching for the single-eyed vision of the Christ mind. Remember
my statement that if thine eye be single, thy whole body is full of
light. A house divided against itself cannot move forward on the path.
To overcome this stalemate, you need to get to a point where you realize
that giving up sex is not a loss because you get something more important
and fulfilling in return. You need to do some soul searching and decide
on your true soul priorities. How badly do you want the inner wholeness
of your soul? You need to decide that no matter how wonderful sex might
feel, you desire something more. You desire something deeper, namely
the sense of oneness with your spiritual self, which I can assure you
is a far greater sense of ecstasy and fulfillment than anything you
could experience during sex. You must decide to stop chasing the pot
of gold at the end of the rainbow and instead direct your attention
within.
This is what I attempted to explain in my saying to seek first the kingdom
of God and his righteousness and all else shall be added unto you. The
kingdom of God is the Christ consciousness and it can be attained only
through union with your Christ self, which is the mediator between your
soul and your I AM Presence. Your Christ self is inside of you, and
the key to retaining contact with that Christ self is to direct your
attention within. When you to attain contact with your Christ self and
the righteousness, meaning the right use of your free will and your
attention, all else, meaning the sense of ultimate union with your spiritual
self, will be added unto you. It is truly the Father’s good pleasure
to give you the kingdom of spiritual union. However, the key to the
kingdom is inside yourself.
So my basic point for this long discourse is to show you that the ultimate
way to overcome an addiction to sex is to take a two-pronged approach:
- Use all tools available
to free yourself from the outer forces that seek to trap you in an
addiction to sex, as described elsewhere.
- When you have made a
sincere effort to rise above the downward pull of dark forces and
the mass consciousness, recognize that your desire for sexual union
springs from you soul’s desire for wholeness. Recognize that
this desire cannot be ultimately fulfilled through sexual union. Therefore,
channel your attention into seeking union with your Christ self instead
of union with another person.
My point is that the addiction
to sex can spring from a true desire, namely the desire for inner wholeness,
yet by seeking it through sex, you will guarantee that the goal can
never be achieved. No human being – nothing from this world –
can replace your spiritual self. There are many substitutes that will
cover over your sense of unwholeness. Yet there is no substitute that
will truly give you wholeness. Therefore, seek first the kingdom of
God . . .
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Copyright
© 2004 by Kim Michaels |
